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Forthcoming Operation

You may recall that back in March I had a sudden trip  to the hospital via ambulance and had to have emergency surgery to remove a cyst on my ovary. This was the third operation having had another cyst on the other ovary and a also rather large fibroid.

During  the last operation they spotted more fibroids and turns out that they are growing (though luckily not as big as the first set) and since the op I've been suffering from very bad PMT. So I finally plucked up the courage to go and see the wonderful Mr Bidmead who removed the first set of fibroids and decided that enough was enough. There are only so many operations a girl can take, especially in the same region and came to the decision to opt for the full hysterectomy. Now this may seem drastic, and indeed a few of my female friends seem to disapprove of my decision but my quality of life at the moment is being effected as at least 2 out 4 weeks when I am not feeling at my best to say the least, and many aspects of the PMT can be pretty bad, especially the angry and bloaty parts!

But then I feel guilty that I can be so flippant in some respects about the whole thing and that it is my choice. My attitude is that I have never wanted kids and so why hold onto equipment that is surplus to requirements for sentimental reasons. But there are other people for whom it's not a choice and they desperately want kids and this is when I feel guilty.

Then again I have to do what is right for me and my body. If I didn't have the op there is a very strong possibility that I will get another cyst and believe me they hurt like hell when they twist (though the bloke in A&E didn't seem to think it should have hurt that much - typical!). I'm going straight onto HRT after the operation and I'm still trying to work out if this will finally make me feel like a grown up. Nearly 40 and I still feel like I'm a teenager...

Anyway I have one more week to go before the big op. I know I normally write about things I've done with lots of pictures but thought I should blog my feelings about this before I go in. No doubt I will blog afterwards as well. I have at least six weeks to recuperate and OH is coming to look after me for the first week at least. I have a huge pile of DVD box sets and craft projects to tackle (or finish) to keep me going so in a way I'm looking forward to it. And to be honest it will be such a relief once I've had the operation and hopefully 2013 will be a healthy year for me (as well as a crafty one).

Anyway sorry to possibly be on a downer. To cheer you up here is a picture of lovely autumn leaves - you gotta love autumn!

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